Wanna A Reason to Avoid The Gym?

Actually when it comes to avoiding the gym then the guys at Dude Perfect can give you loads of good reasons why you should avoid the place at all costs in this hilarious video of theirs.

So take a leaf out of queerguru's book and maybe take a well earned rest to think about this whole exercise thing much more.

White Was Too Fattening

The veteran French actor Michel Galabru, winner of a Cesar Award (French Oscars) has died aged 93 years old. Despite his many heavyweight serious roles he will always be fondly remembered for play the ultra-conservative politician Simon Charrier in the classic gay movie "La Cages Aux Folles".  When forced to don drag to avoid the Press, he bitterly complained that ''white was too fattening".

Michel  Edmond Galabru (27 October 1922 – 4 January 2016)

The Best LGBT Movies of 2015 (pt 1)

2015 was another good year for queer cinema from mainstream to indie from drama  to  documentary, and here is our pick of the very best feature films that we saw this year.

12) : "A Land Of Storms"

The beauty of this very tender movie of gay self-discovery from Hungarian filmmaker Ádám Császi is the very sensual and somewhat sad way that he rather unsentimentally deals with these boy’s experiences in this rather harsh environment.  It is daringly sensuous and although this tender and touching tale is both erotically and emotional charged, for a refreshing change it avoids any temptation to develop into a cliché melodrama. 

11) : " In The Gray Scale"  

Newbie Chilean filmmaker Claudio Marcone's impressive debut allowa the whole dilemma of this boy-meets-boy romance to unfurl and blossom before neatly showing us that not everything in life is so black and white. He does so at a slow comfortable pace that makes the story resonate so perfectly as we come to appreciate how tenuous this relationship is, and that as much as we may root for a traditional happy-ever-after ending it's hard to second guess if eventually Bruno will actually walk away from his newly found happiness.

10) : Boulevard 

In one of his last movies before his untimely death  Robin Williams gives a career-best performance with this quiet un-showy role as he beautifully captures the angst mixed with relief of a married man finally acknowledging to himself he is gay.

9) Dishonored Bodies.

Juanma Carrillo is a Spanish independent filmmaker, producer, photographer and occasional musician whose collection of short movies are always highly intriguing, extremely sensuous, often avant-garde art pieces of art, but always immensely engaging. He seems to set out to shock and titillate his audience, and is not adverse to adding a few humorous touches, and even showing his romantic side some times. 

8) : "Boy Meets Girl" 

Eric Schaeffer's refreshing and enchanting drama about three 20 year-olds looking for love in a small backwater town in Kentucky ,gently challenges us to suspend our preconceived views on gender labels and be as open to what happens as these lovelorn kids are.

7) : "Grandma" 

Lily Tomlin shines as a hilarious hippy lesbian grandmother who takes her granddaughter across Los Angeles in search of the money she needs to terminate her unwanted pregnancy in this rather delightful comedy.

6) : "54 The Directors Cut"

Mark Christopher's new Directors Cut of his 1998 movie about the infamous original New York Club is jam-packed with all the excitement and drama that went on behind the scenes at the very birth of the disco era.

5) : "The Danish Girl"

Eddie Redmayne gives a stunning Oscar-worthy performance as Einar Wegener, based on the true story of one of the very first sex-changes operations in the World.

4) : Guidance

This rather wonderful oddball comedy is the work of Canadian filmmaker Pat Mills who wrote, directed and starred in it.  He has a remarkable delightful droll sense of humor that is quite black, totally politically incorrect but never ever mean.

3) : "Nasty Baby"

Chilean queer filmmaker Sebastián Silva stars in his first US based movie and plays a hot-headed artist who with his gay lover wants to become a parent with the help of  a goofy girlfriend but things go very badly wrong and nothing turns out like you would expect it too in this deliciously wonderful black comedy.

2) : "Tangerine"

Ever since filmmaker Sean Baker showed this high-voltage movie of his (shot entirely on IPhones) at Sundance,  there has been a sensational buzz about the performances of his two lead transgendered newbie actors Kiki Kitana Rodriquez and Mya Taylor. Baker credits the actors for drawing on their own personal experiences that gave such a authenticity and vitality to all their unstoppable bad-mouthing which is such a sheer delight to watch and listen too.  

1) : "Carol"

Todd Haynes's six feature film is near perfection in every tiny detail : from Phyllis Nagy's script of this beautiful Patricia Highsmith  love story, to the superb career-best performances from Cate Blanchett and Rooney Mara.  If Haynes doesn't finally get an Oscar for this, then there is no justice.

P.S.  Up next the Best LGBT Documentaries of 2015.

Kylie's Trick In Getting A Shining Knight

queerguru loves T.V. shows that do not take themselves too seriously, and we have found a new one that we have fallen in love and with and put on the top of our 'must-see' list from now on.   When ABC's parody fantasy/fairytale musical sitcom Galavant was renewed for a second season despite it's poor ratings it came back this weekend with a very tongue-in-cheek series premiere entitled "A New Season aka Suck it Cancellation Bear".

It opened with a very funny song called 'A New Season' that asked the audience to 'screw all those apprentices and every batchelorette" and went in to boast of an upcoming roster of "new guest's who'll cost the network a fortune".

The first of these guests (who may or may not have indeed cost that much) was the wonderful Kylie Minogue who was even more outrageously camp than usual (hard to believe, we know). Kylie played The Queen (!) owner of the Enchanted Forest's resident gay bar who flirts with the (very hot) Galavant (Joshua Sasse) ordering him to either remove his shirt or be thrown to ‘The Bear’.

She sings to the knight: “You trespassed upon my kingdom, and now you’re in my sway. Which basically means as Queen of all queens, I’m going to make you pay. One thing for sure will settle the score, and trust me it’s more than fair. Off with his shirt! Strip him down. Don’t be shy boys, go to town.”

P.S. Like all fairytales, this one has a very happy ending.  Since the scene was filmed in L.A. in September the petite Australian 47 year -old diva and the hunky 28 year-old Brit actor have very much become an "item".  Here are pics of them (courtesy of Getty Images) on the happy couple celebrating at a rugby match.   Just like her big 1998 hit single 'I Should Be So Lucky' , we say that Kylie so deserves to be exactly as that.

Saddle Up

Warning : the details below are for a very private total lock-in sex party at The Hoist,  London's best known gay fetish club.

This is an "event" where willing "mares" offer themselves to "stallions" without ever seeing their faces, but you must obey ALL the very strict rules. So we guess the first and most important thing is to establish which role is a natural fit for you, as evidently no-one is allowed to change their minds once you have entered "The Stable". 

"Mares" must arrive between 8:30pm and 9.15pm and their dress code : Boots or Trainers and a Harness if you wish. "Stable Lads" who are there to ensure the safety of "Mares" must arrive at the same time, and their dress code is Sports Socks, Shorts and Trainers.  It is however crucial that "Stallions" do not meet any Mares before the event so they cannot arrive before 9.30 pm. Their dress code : Leather, Jock, Harness, Shorts etc.

P.S. the rules actually go into very minute detail e.g. if a Stallion decides to mate with another Stallion they will be immediately evicted, so too will any Mare that refuses to put out ...... so click on the link if you are not aware of what is the very precise etiquette of having sex in this particular stable ........ 

http://www.hoistclub.co.uk/page2/Rules/

All this will cost you just £10 for which you get a sealable bag for your money to put into your socks and shoes (which we assume are the only clothes you will be wearing.  The Hoist only take cash but evidently there is an ATM/Cash Point at the cafe next door called Dirty Burger (and yes, that is its real name).

The Club is actually closed to the public for the whole evening so anything goes and so the organizers promise to lay on plenty of free condoms and lube. The tough part though is to get an invitation to attend in the first place. The best way is to be referred by one of the the regulars as they are all allowed to bring guests as long as they meet the Hoist Private and H-Partyboys brief: sexy, fit, handsome, gay or bi, men.  According to the many rules, they have nothing against fit attractive mature guys who look after themselves too (that is anyone older than 40!), which is awfully sporting of them. Or you could just try and persuade James The Livery Manager, that his party needs to include you, but do that now as you will need to be told the (secret?) password to get in.

Just in case you are confused by all the double entendres and still think this is all about breeding horses, we should re-assure you that none of the following will be taking place:-

Find Your Inner Drag Self

Could 2016 be the year that you finally let your inner Drag persona finally come out? Need that extra push ...... and some very good tips on how to enchant more than just the mirror in your bedroom behind closed doors with your unbridled talent? Then if you live in the UK, you are very lucky as help is at hand.  Those nice people at Finger in the Pie Theatre Group are running The Art of Drag Course for 10 weeks starting January 18th.

It's run by experienced cabaret performer Michael Twaits and the Course is designed for people who already have a background in performance and who want to create a unique drag character and routine. It includes master classes on singing, alt performance, lip-sync and comedy – before going on to teach you about the business of cabaret – including how to market yourself, sell your act and get booked by promoters. At the end of the course you will have the opportunity to launch your professional career as a drag performer with a showcase at Finger in the Pie Cabaret at the world famous Royal Vauxhall Tavern.

If you've been telling your friends for years that you could/should have been been treading the boards at The Vauxhall or even still, have been chosen by Ru Paul to be on Drag Race, then here's your chance.  AND if you book by January 5th, you'll get the Early Bird special price for the course.

Click here for more information and to book the Course

Legendary R & B singer Natalie Cole dies

The R & B singer Natalie Cole, winner of 9 Grammy Awards died today at the age of 65 after several years of health issues.The daughter of the late great Nat King Cole, Natalie rose to musical success in the mid-1970s with hits "This Will Be", "Inseparable", and "Our Love". Her biggest success however came in the late 1990s when she re-recorded standards by her father. Unforgettable... with Love, which sold over seven million copies and also won her several of her Grammy Awards.   This track, a duet with her father, thanks to the miracle of modern technology, shows Natalie Cole at her very best.

Natalie Cole (February 6, 1950 – December 31, 2015)